Reports: Numerous NFL Teams Expressing Interest in former NBA player Jabari Bird

New Jersey – Despite having no meaningful football experience and no discernible football skill, reports have surfaced that numerous NFL teams have expressed ‘significant interest’ in signing former NBA player, Jabari Bird, after he was waived by the Atlanta Hawks. The former NBA reserve made headlines in 2018 when he was arrested for allegedly strangling… Read More Reports: Numerous NFL Teams Expressing Interest in former NBA player Jabari Bird

Ante Žižić Pens Tearful Farewell to Celtics Fans in Players Tribune

Boston – Shortly after learning he was traded to the Cleveland Cavaliers as a key piece in the deal that brought Kyrie Irving to Boston, Ante Žižić, known first as a poet and second as a basketball phenom, took to The Players Tribune to thank Celtics fans for an incredible run. “It hurts, man, it really,… Read More Ante Žižić Pens Tearful Farewell to Celtics Fans in Players Tribune

Hawks to Rest Entire Coaching Staff Tonight in Preparation for Playoffs

Atlanta – Locked into the fifth seed with only tonight’s game remaining in the 2016-2017 regular season, the Atlanta Hawks have decided to rest their entire coaching staff with the playoffs just around the corner. This step marks the latest in the ever-increasing trend of NBA teams using advanced medical data to drive their nightly decisions. “Coach Bud… Read More Hawks to Rest Entire Coaching Staff Tonight in Preparation for Playoffs

NCAA to Investigate UNC for Receiving ‘Impermissible’ Hats & T-Shirts

Chapel Hill, NC – The UNC-Chapel Hill athletic department was notified late Monday night that the NCAA is investigating the hats and t-shirts donned by players immediately after winning the 2017 NCAA Basketball Championship. NCAA investigators believe that receipt of the basic clothing items violates compliance regulations against receiving ‘impermissible benefits’, despite the fact that those items were… Read More NCAA to Investigate UNC for Receiving ‘Impermissible’ Hats & T-Shirts

Grumpy Guy in Accounting Complains “Internet So Slow on Thursdays & Fridays” During Tax Season

Stamford, CT – Arthur Edmonds can’t seem to figure out why his company’s internet speed always seems dramatically slow in mid-to-late March and early April, especially on Thursdays and Fridays. When asked his thoughts on why the internet speed slowed dramatically, Arthur was unsure: “This happens every single year right in the heat of tax season, there… Read More Grumpy Guy in Accounting Complains “Internet So Slow on Thursdays & Fridays” During Tax Season