Jeremy ‘Linfuriated’ Over Lack of Catchy Porzingas Nickname

linCHARLOTTE – In a rare display of frustration, Hornets point guard Jeremy Lin expressed his outrage over the lack of an obvious and catchy nickname for New York Knicks rookie Kristaps Porzingas. “As a fan of the game, I find it absolutely appalling that we could be a full 15 games into the season and ‘The Zinger’ doesn’t have a solid nickname,” remarked Lin, as he sarcastically made air-quotes with both hands as he said ‘The Zinger’, which currently stands as the front-runner for best nickname according to the latest ESPN/USA Today Poll. Lin admitted that he had spent “countless hours” trying to come up with a better nickname, but was unsuccessful. “It’s crazy. Has there ever been a less pun-able name? This is absurd. This has to be affecting him on the court,” Lin added.

At press time, various sources noted that “PorzLingas” was gaining sudden traction as a possible nickname. Unconfirmed reports suggest that this latest idea originated somewhere in the North Carolina area.


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