New York, New York – Multiple sources have confirmed that former FIFA President, Sepp Blatter, was in attendance for the infamous campaign meeting with nefarious characters that took place at Trump Tower on June 9th, 2016. “It is not possible to say whether or not I was at the meeting,” Blatter claimed, despite the revelations… Read More Breaking: Sepp Blatter Attended Controversial Meeting at Trump Tower
Rio de Janeiro – Extensive DNA testing of the Olympic pool water has confirmed what many feared would happen: Ryan Lochte has peed in the pool. Officials grew suspicious after Lochte hung onto the lane line for an unusual amount of time following the 200M Individual Medley. “It looked like [Lochte] was just trying to read the scoreboard… Read More Lochte Disqualified for Peeing in Pool
Rio de Janeiro – The IOC has finally issued a proclamation that all Russian horses involved in equestrian events will be banned from further competition in the 2016 Olympics. These horses are the latest in a series of high-profile suspensions that came following the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) investigation which unveiled a rigorous state-run doping program… Read More Russian Equestrian Horses Banned for Doping
Zurich – The International Olympic Committee (IOC) is prepared to vote on a motion to include Freeze-Tag as a trial sport for the 2024 Olympic program. IOC officials have been reportedly looking to add a tag-based program to the Olympic roster for years, ultimately deciding on Freeze-Tag given its incredible athletic requirements. “We have all… Read More Freeze-Tag Considered for 2024 Olympics
Rio De Janeiro – While many athletes are complaining about the heavily polluted waters leading up to the 2016 Olympic Games in Brazil, Hans Bergenbeim has decided to use the situation to his advantage, opting to keep the third arm he recently grew after a few practice sessions at the Rio venue. “When life gives you… Read More Olympic Sailor Grows Advantageous Third Arm After Practicing in Rio Waters
The Hyperbolic Chamber 