New England – Tom Brady shocked many supporters when he announced that he planned to skip the New England Patriots victory trip to the White House on Wednesday, albeit not for political reasons. While many of his teammates refused to participate due to their aversion to the anthropomorphized fake-Rolex that now occupies the White House,… Read More Brady Skips White House Visit for a “Family Matters” TV Marathon
Washington D.C. – President Obama refused to comment on a recently-published report from the House Committee on Homeland Security that revealed Guantanamo Bay prisoners have been forced to watch episodes of FS1’s sports talk show ‘Undisputed’. The 231 page report details a pattern of widespread abuse in which prisoners were sat in reasonably-comfortable chairs for periods of… Read More Obama Under Fire After Oversight Committee Finds Guantanamo Bay Prisoners Forced to Watch ‘Undisputed’
Havana – President Obama attended a historic baseball game in Cuba on Tuesday that lasted only 36 minutes due to the lack of constant advertising and stadium gimmicks. The game between the Cuban National Team and Tampa Bay Rays went a full nine innings. “That was great,” said President Obama speaking to the American sports media in… Read More Cuban Game Takes Only 36min Without Advertisements
The Hyperbolic Chamber 